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Should you follow your heart in your dating life? What about following wisdom instead?

Indeed, if you want to UN-complicate your dating life, avoid the three common dating mistakes enumerated in this video, and enjoy a dating life filled with both purpose and passion.

Beware of Following Your Heart

God is well aware that we are spiritually undiscerning most of the time.

As it is written: “None is righteous, no, not one; no one understands; no one seeks for God. All have turned aside; together they have become worthless; no one does good, not even one.”Romans 3:10-12 ESV

He knows we’re particularly compromised when it comes to the longings of our heart.

The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately sick; …  — Jeremiah 17:9a ESV

Indeed, many a strong and true believer has been deceived by their own heart.

Instead of knowing the will of God in romance, they were actually only feeling their own will. This is why, after warning us that “the heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately sick,” The Prophet Jeremiah finishes verse 9 by asking:

… who can understand it?Jeremiah 17:9b ESV

Thankfully, God answers Jerry’s question in the following verse:

“I the Lord search the heart and test the mind, to give every man according to his ways, according to the fruit of his deeds.”  — Jeremiah 17:10 ESV

So, if you believe God has revealed “the one” to you before you’ve thoroughly gotten to know “the one,” why not give yourself several months to search your own heart and test your own mind. Better yet, seek His heart and understanding.

What God Told Me about My Wife before We Dated

I totally understand that desire to want to know if you’re going to marry someone before you ever date them. It certainly takes away all the guesswork, right?

I’ll never forget a conversation I had with God before Julie and I started dating. I share the dialogue below, but know these words are not in the Bible, and I didn’t transcribe the conversation, so God’s words are merely paraphrased.

God: You know if you and Julie wanted to date more seriously, I would like that.

Me: You would like that because she’s “the one”?

God: I’m just saying that if you and Julie wanted to take your relationship to the next level that would please me.

Me: That would please you because you want us to get married?

God didn’t answer. God did not tell me I was to marry Julie. God didn’t even tell me to date her, but through that prayer conversation, I clearly sensed God’s blessing on asking Julie if she wanted to enter a serious dating relationship. [Hear more of our story here.]

I also had the blessing of my pastor and two accountability partners whom I met with weekly, along with my best friend and my mom, all who knew me inside and out and wanted God’s best for my life. So I wasn’t just moving forward based on voices I was hearing in my head.

Still, asking Julie to be my girlfriend was a huge step of faith, one I believed God was happy for me to take. But I truly had no idea where that would lead us.

For we walk by faith, not by sight.2 Corinthians 5:7 ESV

[The above post is an excerpt right from Date Like You Know What You’re Doing: Your DatePrep Guide. I wrote it to empower YOU to grow spiritually and date wisely so you can marry well. Check out the book and video curriculum here!]