Skip to main content

Register for RELATION^OLOGY in-person high school or young adult classes. Save 30% NOW!

dna-top5 2014We’re on the homestretch of last week’s TOP10 hottest posts of 2014.

Here’s five down to one.

In the previous year (2013) every single post in the TOP5 addressed the same topic.

What was it?

I’ll give you a hint: It starts with an “S” and rhymes with pecs.

However, in this past year, only 3.5 of the TOP5 posts dealt with sex. (What’s up with the .5? Simply put, #3 isn’t really about sex, but it takes it’s name from a popular book about sexual purity which rhymes with True Love Mates, but is sort of about the opposite idea.)

#5: The Five Sex Lies

This post is actually a summary of a guest blog series I had the privilege of contributing over at Faith on Campus. It also makes an intriguing seminar for groups curious about how God’s word applies to our sexuality.

That was a sales pitch.

Which means that this is your opportunity to contact me about sharing with your college, youth, young adult, singles, or quilting group.

Not sold? Check out the post which begins like so…

“They tell you sex has become a mess because it was hushed up. But for the last twenty years it has not been hushed up. It has been chattered about all day long. Yet it is still in a mess. If hushing up had been the cause of the trouble, ventilation would have set it right. But it has not. I think it is the other way round. I think the human race originally hushed it up because it had become such a mess.”

Who said that?

Do you know?

Perhaps a more surprising question is “when?”

Would you believe someone living over 65 years ago?!

C.S. Lewis includes this observation in his complete treaties on sexual morality in Mere Christianity, but not even Lewis could have grasped how prophetic his words would become.

In the hopes of bringing a little more clarity to this emotionally charged topic I present The Five Sex Lies. [Read More]

#4: What Does the Porn Say?

The title of this post was inspired by some YouTube video about the speech pattern of a certain species of canine. However, the body of the post came from 5-second content I share every weekday called Inspiration for Saving Sex . You can check it out on either Facebook or Twitter.

This post is also the first of six in a series I now refer to as The Porn Posts. If you know of someone who struggles with this extremely rare vice (perhaps your sister’s uncle’s brother’s son) this is a great post.

Here’s what it says for starters…

They ask, “What does the fox say?”

I answer, “Foxes don’t talk, so they don’t say anything. Except in the land of Narnia.”

But do you know what does talk, even when it doesn’t make a sound?


What does the porn say?

I’ve spent considerable time thinking about the answer to that question, trying to deduce what sucked me in, over and over again, in spite of how sucky I felt afterwards; how ashamed; empty; powerless; dirty.

I decided that, like most sins, porn is a pretty good liar.

OK, really good.

Seriously, porn attempts to sell us some fantastic deceptions. (We don’t call them sexual fantasies for nothing.) And for a long time I believed them.

How about you? Have you fallen for any of these porn lies. [Read More]

#3: True Love Doesn’t Just Wait

Some guy wrote some book called True Love Waits. You probably never heard of it, but it resulted in the author being crucified on a cross of unmet expectations.

In any case, someone else you probably never heard of pointed out to me that True Love doesn’t merely wait. It PREPARES!

Who said that?

You find out in the first part of the post…

Not everyone gets to meet their wife’s ex-boyfriend from high school, much less, gets the privilege of anticipating that meeting.

It was the Summer of ’09. My wife, Julie, and I packed the kids into the minivan for a pilgrimage to Topeka, KS where we would join many other pilgrims for a reunion of the youth group in which my wife grew up.

Only the connective power of Facebook could make something like this happen. Indeed, Facebook not only made it happen, it told us who was coming. So I knew ahead of time that I would be meeting Bill. That would be the ex-boyfriend from high school.

Oh joy.

And even more joy, because he’d be coming with his wife and kids.

But WAIT! The joy just keeps on coming, since both of Bill’s sisters (who were also former youth groupies) would be attending as well, along with their families.

And even Julie had forgotten how involved Bill’s parents had been in the youth group back in it’s heyday and, YEP, they came too.

So basically, thanks to Facebook, I got to attend the family reunion of my wife’s ex-boyfriend from high school.

Thanks, Facebook! You shouldn’t have.

No really, you shouldn’t. [Read More]

#2: Don’t Date Like a Dummy

This post was created as an easy way to navigate the 38 posts in the TOP10 Dumbest Reasons to Date. It’s a talk I LOVE sharing with college, youth and young adults, but the written format allows me greater depth and you greater reflection than a live talk.

Even better? Get everyone on the same metaphorical page with a LoveEd live event presenting the TOP10 talk for your school or church and then use the blog to go deep in small groups in the following weeks.

(Wait. Was that another sales pitch?)

Let me pitch you the introduction to the post…

Whether you have found dating to be a tad daunting or whether your dating life is a complete disaster, I pose this question: Would you like to thrive throughout your dating experience?

Truth is, I merely survived the dating process. I emerged with an amazing wife who, after 20+ years, is still my best friend, but I made many missteps. Ridiculous missteps that would have never been made had I examined and understood the motives which drove me to date.

I believe you can thrive in your dating experience if you understand and commit to avoiding these ten dating blunders. But it’s going to take more than one quick post to do that. That’s why I spent the majority of last year walking through the TOP10 Dumbest Reasons to Date in our Date Night Advice (DNA) blog.

Now, here for the first time, I share all ten in one post, with hyperlinks for each dumb reason, so you can drill down and understand the motives of which you suspect you might be guilty. [Read More]

#1: Intercourse: It’s Not Just a City in Pennsylvania

Unlike Atlantis, Intercourse is a real city. And it’s not under water.

This post is real too. And it’s not under water either. However I hope it helps you understand your sexuality in a way that empowers you to walk in freedom from shame and legalism.

And it goes like so…

Who would name a blog post: Intercourse: It’s Not Just a City in Pennsylvania?

Who would name a city in Pennsylvania: Intercourse?

I, for one, am just glad to know when Intercourse was actually established: 1754, according to this sign. Of course that leaves a lot of unanswered questions, like where the population of intercourse came from before intercourse was actually established.

But I digress. This post wasn’t actually inspired by any particular city, but by the fact that the TOP5 most read posts of last year were all about sex, and every one of them came from a series I now affectionately refer to as The Sexual Intercourse. Since this topic seems to resonate so powerfully with so many, I thought I’d synopsize the entire series here for posterity. [Read More]

That’s it. The hottest hotties that every hottied, as far as Date Night Advice (DNA) goes.

Whether you’ve read all of these already, or this is your first DNA exposure, I’m blessed that you took the time. And I pray the Lover of your soul will bless you in return.

I find He’s like that. Sovereign and all.

Trust Him just a little more in 2015.

And, trust me, He wants you reading this post every week. And to sign up for our FREE FMU e-newsletter by hitting me up on Twitter. And to inquire about having me love on your school and church. And to check out our study guides at the link below.

And remember our slogan…

DNA: It’s What’s For Dating

Dug this weekend’s DNA? Tell your friends by liking or commenting on our FMU Facebook page or on your own Facebook page by clicking the button below.

The LoveEd study guide series, Beyond Sex & Salvation, will empower you to prepare for relational success when it counts: BEFORE YOU FALL IN LOVE! It’s NOT for couples, but for any wise individual who thinks they might want to get married sometime before they die. Check out the first two 8-lesson study guides in our store. You can walk through it on your own, but it’s more fun with friends, so consider putting together an FMU LoveEd small group study. Even better?  And ask a married couple you respect to lead it!