Skip to main content

It’s our favorite night of the year! An Evening With FMU. RSVP here.

[Updated: 12/9/19]

What could sex possibly have in common with Christmas?

A ho ho whole lot of things, boys and girls! This is only the TOP10. So grab a cup of hot cocoa and get in the spirit!

#10: Mistletoe
Admittedly, I haven’t studied the history of how a tree parasite with white berries became associated with both Christmas and romance. Then again, I’m not really sure how a virgin birthing a baby in a stable has anything to do with Frosty the snowman.

#9: They’re both sacred experiences trivialized by pop culture.
The music we listen to and the media we watch powerfully impact how we feel about them. Often times, more than we realize. Endless advertising can turn us into greedy Grinches, draining the wonder out of the history-altering miracle Christmas celebrates. Similarly, the relentless promotion of sexual promiscuity inflames our desire for sex, while at the same time diminishing our ability to enjoy it. (Got ED?)

#8: Santa loves both.
Ask him… or Mrs. Claus.

Oh come on now! Where in the world do you think all those little elves came from?

Do you think they were all accidentally kidnapped from orphanages, like Buddy? Speaking of Buddy…

#7: Will Ferrell stars in popular movies about both.
Due to the base humor and sexual content of most Will Ferrell movies, Elf is one of the few I’ve ever seen. However, even Elf has that shower scene. Was that necessary? Honestly?

Just because there isn’t any nudity doesn’t make it “innocent.” Even a silly shower scene can be a turn-on and treating sexual arousal like a recreational activity is dangerous because sex isn’t just some specific act you’re supposed to avoid. Sex is a conversation.

#6: Mystery
Whether you’re talking about Santa or sex, it’s best to learn the truth from a parent or trusted adult. Unfortunately most of us found out from the kids at school. In the case of Santa, it hurt and we felt foolish, but at least we knew the truth. In the case of sex, it awakened passions, but felt dirty, and unfortunately we never quite get the whole truth in this manner.

#5: Madison Avenue pimps both of them to sell everything from chewing gum to sports cars.
“There are people who want to keep our sex instinct inflamed in order to make money out of us. Because, of course, a man with an obsession is a man who has very little sales-resistance.”

Do you know who said that?

C.S. Lewis in Mere Christianity – written over 65 years ago. (Go back and read that quote again. It’s the best part of this post.)

Of course, not even Lewis could have imagined how the marketing mavens would manage to cash in on the birth of a poor child in a cave.

#4: Charlie Brown
He stars in the best Christmas television special ever made! And though you never see ol Chuck’s parents, that doesn’t mean he’s a test tube baby. At some point in time there must have been two “wha-wha-wha-ing” adults who came together to produce our beloved blockhead.

But would that make them sexually compatible?

#3: Its the wait that makes it special.
In spite of this, many young people do everything they can to find out what’s under the tree ahead of time, not understanding that the anticipation, suspense and long-awaited surprise are all intended to add to the pleasure of the gift. And in the case of sex the consequences of not waiting are profound and not fun.

#2: The enjoyment of both should deepen over time.
As you mature, Christmas simply doesn’t hold the same intensity of excitement. The same is true about sex. The youthful, passionate love Julie and I made in the early years of marriage isn’t the same 19+ years later.

However, it has become a richer and more meaningful experience. Just like Christmas. And because of that, we enjoy both Christmas and sex far more than we did when we were younger. Far more.

#1: They were both intended to celebrate a depth of love that moves us to give.
Jesus wasn’t laid in a manger so that we could covet every fancy thing we see on TV, but so even poor shepherds could know God’s love in a real, tangible and personal way. Likewise, God didn’t give us the gift of sex so we could lust after every pretty person we see on TV, but so that lonely people like you and me could consummate and celebrate a relationship forged in a life-long covenant.

Merry Christmas!

We eventually discover that what our souls truly long for is something far greater than material gifts under an evergreen (or plastic) tree.

In the same way, I hope you realize that your soul longs infinitely more for relational and emotional intimacy than it does for sexual intimacy. In fact, if you insist on pursuing the sexual relationship of your dreams, then you risk missing the beauty of the relationships with which you’ve already been blessed. Just like the child with the 40-page wish list will miss the promised gift which has already come.

Enjoyed the format of this TOP Things Sex has in Common with… post? There’s more!

The LoveEd discipleship series, Beyond Sex & Salvation, will empower you to prepare for relational success when it counts: BEFORE you fall in love!

It’s NOT for couples, but for any wise individual who thinks they might want to get married sometime before they die. And would like to learn how to better build healthy relationships in the meantime.

Check out all three study guides in our store. You can walk through them on your own, but it’s more fun with friends (that and it kinda makes sense to grow in relational success in actual relationships with others), so consider putting together an FMU LoveEd small group study.

Even better? And ask a rock star married couple you respect to lead it!

[Originally published: Dec 2012]